30 Day BDSM Challenge: Day 1

Day 1: Dom, sub, switch?  What parts of BDSM interests you?  Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you.  Basically define your kinky self for us.

I identify as a submissive out of those three choices.  In my heart, I am a slave.  I live to make my Master (Husband) happy.

What parts interest me?  Oh wow, many many parts.  There is so much I'm curious about!  So many things I want to try.  I would love to be in a 24/7 TPE relationship, where I stayed at home, all day, doing everything my Master wanted me to.  I would love to be micromanaged, I would love to be taken at any given time of the day, whenever the urge struck Master.  I would love to wear a collar all the time (an actual collar, not just the necklace I made myself).

I would love to be tied to a St. Andrews cross and whipped, flogged, caned, etc.  I would love to be thrown over my Master's knee, naked, and spanked until I cry.  I would love to try clamps, duct tape, hot wax, and all sorts of ouchy, wonderful things.

I would love to be tied to the bed, and slowly tortured, to be taught to cum on command, so just by Master saying a word, I would orgasm uncontrollably.  I would love to be told to make myself cum while Master watched.

But ultimately, it boils down to what make Master happy.  And as long as I'm making Master happy, I feel that I'm a good slave, submissive, whatever you call it.  It is my job to do what Master wants me to do, and it is my job to make sure Master is happy, and all his needs are met.  He is in control, and I will do as he wishes.  And if Master is happy, then I am happy!

30-Day BDSM Challenge: An Introduction

So, Anastassia posted this on her blog,  and I've decided to do the same thing.  I will actually post two blogs tonight, and it will take me up to the last day of February.


So, instead of boring ramblings about my everyday, hum drum life, hee hee, this is what you will be reading about for the next month!

The questions I will be answering are:

• Dom, sub, switch?  What parts of BDSM interest you?  Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.
• List your kinks.
• How did you discover you were kinky?
• Any early experiences that, in retrospect, hint at your kinks?
• What was your first kinky sexual experience?  If you haven’t had one yet, talk about what you hope to have happen.
• Describe your weirdest/most interesting sexual fantasy.
• What’s your favorite toy?
• Post a kinky image you find erotic.
• Post a kink related song or music video you enjoy.
• What are your hard limits?
• What are your views on the ethics of kink?
• Tell us about a humorous BDSM/kink experience you’ve had.  If you haven’t had one, talk about aspects of kink/BDSM you find funny.
• Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you?  Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?
• How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?  If you haven’t experienced real life BDSM/kink how do you think it might differ?
• Write about a BDSM/kink activity you’re curious about and would like to try.
• What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?
• What misconception about kinky people would you most like to clear up?
• Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves?  If so, what are they?
• Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life?  If so, what are they?
• Talk about something within kink/bdsm that you’re curious about/don’t understand.
• Favorite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction)
• What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy?  How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?
• Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed?  How so?
• What qualities do you look for in a partner?
• How open are you about your kinks?
• What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?
• Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?
• How do you dress for kink/BDSM play?  What significance does your attire have to you?
• Do you have a BDSM title (e.g. mistress, master, slut, pig, whore, princess, goddess, ma’am, sir)?  What is your opinion of the use of titles in general?
• Whatever BDSM/kink related thing you want to write about.

If you decide to answer them for yourself, leave me a link in the comments!  

I always love new blogs to follow!

Sick

So, it's that time of year again, Girl Scout cookie time.  And, since it's that time, it's also time I come down with a cold.  EVERY YEAR!  So, last night, I started feeling sniffly, and today, it's been a headache on and off all day, with a sniffly nose, and a little bit of a scratchy throat.  I'm determined to fight this, and not let it hold me down.  I did do a workout today, 42 minutes on the Elliptical.  Tomorrow I plan to do the weights.

I've had an enjoyable 3 day weekend, and while it's a short day, I'm not looking forward to going back to work.  I enjoy staying home, I miss being a SAHM.  I think one of the main reasons is, I'm a control freak.  And, my being at work, I don't know EVERYTHING that is going on.  I'm still learning to deal with that though.

Anyway, things are going to start getting busy for me, DD has the talent show, karate (testing for Yellow belt in a couple weeks), Science Olympiad, Girl Scout badges to work on.  Plus it's cookie time, so we'll be out and about doing booths.

I need to get on my game, and get organized!

Plus, tomorrow, I apply for the full time position!

Lost it

I've lost my motivation, and today, I seem to have lost my energy.  Right now I am so tired, I feel like someone just pulled a plug on me.  And, I have stuff I should do.  Dishes from tonight's dinner with my sister and brother in law, which was a good time!

I started off this new year with big plans, and I'm not doing so well.  I lost 4 pounds in the first 2 weeks of the year, well, 3 of them are back already.  I still go to the Y, not every day, but pretty often.  But my eating habits suck.

I know part of it is cause I'm in the midst of changes, especially at work, where I don't know what is going to be happening after the next couple weeks, and I hate that.

I feel like all I've been doing for a while is whining and crying, and bitching.  I need to figure out a way to change my attitude and do it.

I need to stop whining and complaining, and buckle down and make some changes.  I do need to be patient though, work through my 52 list.  Master will be picking a new habit for me tonight.  I'm actually excited to see what he picks.

Here's to a new week, buckling down with my habits, and improving my mood!

Take my Uterus, please!

Ok, I hate my period for a number of reasons, the cramps, the mess, the various body aches and pains, the mood swings from the hormones, etc. etc.  BUT!  The thing I hate the most is it hinders sex.

Funny thing is, it's not Master that is funny about it, it's me.  I have an issue being touched below the waist (and sometimes, above the waist) when I'm on my period.  I feel icky and gross, dirty, all that, when I'm on my period.

I am soooo freaking horny tonight too!  I made sure Master came tonight though, I could have kept going with him for a while.  Funny how that works, my being horny makes we want to go all crazy like on him.

Anyway, I can't wait till the next time we can be together when I'm not on my period.

Sucky day

I had a crappy crappy day.  I think it was compounded by my hormones (that wonderful time of the month), and my blood sugar being off.

It started off good enough, got to nap before work, didn't have to go in till 11.  Got up the courage to talk to D about applying for the Lead position.  And while he didn't totally shoot me down, he did warn me, that it's not often they will take someone one that has only been with the company 7 months, and is only part time, and move them up to a position like that.  The crappy thing is, I really just want a full time teller position, but they aren't giving us that in our branch.  So, I was bummed out because of that, then my blood sugar dropped, so I came home for lunch and cried.  I felt better by the time I went back to work.  Worked, started feeling bummed out again, and then I was out of balance.  I called DD to tell her that I was running late, and she tried to tell me all her awesome news for the day, and I had to cut her off, so I could get back to trying to balance.  I felt like such a crappy mom.  She's sitting at the Y, all by herself, and is excited about her good news, and I can't be there with her.  I am still not used to not being a SAHM, being there for her all the time, it sucks sometimes.

Anyway, I cried at work, turns out that another teller was off a similar amount, so we probably did something wrong together.  But it sucks, cause I was still out 20 dollars, and I'm trying to get promoted, so that doesn't help.

I ended up not working out, just picked up DD from the Y and we went to McDs together, then did grocery shopping.

Now I've got a headache.

On the bright side, DD made it into the talent show, AND, she is up for testing for yellow belt in a couple weeks!  And, Master, and I both have the whole weekend off.  (I don't have to work Monday either, so that's something!)

I am looking forward to going to bed and waking up with a better attitude tomorrow.  I still plan to apply for the Lead, but if I don't get it, whatever.

As long as I'm making Master happy, that's all I care about!

Being brave

So, tomorrow I am going to be brave.  I'm going to fight every panicky, doomsaying voice in my head, and apply for the lead teller position.

If I get it, I'll totally piss someone off.  If I don't, I hope to at least get full time.

I need to talk to my manager tomorrow, to find out exactly what the deal is, what the job position holds, etc.

It is my understanding that the lead teller position comes with a raise, but also more responsibility.

Full time teller comes with a little more responsibility, but no raise.

Both come with cheaper (read: affordable) insurance for my family.

The wuss in me just wants the full time position.

BUT, Master has pointed out, that the lead teller, would be better in the long run.

I keep telling myself, it's like auditioning for a play, audition for the biggest role, and then, if you don't get it, you have a better chance of getting a smaller role.  If you only apply for a small role, they will never cast you in a lead!

So, tomorrow, I will put on my big girl panties, take some midol (cause of course I'm having a hell of a period right now) and march into my managers office and find out how to apply for the lead teller.

Here's to being a grown up!

Submissive Blog Hop Challenge #4/ Questioning Your Submission

Questioning Your Submission

Is there anything about submission (yours or what you see in others) that you question, dislike or repels you? Was there a time you questioned or were resistant to your own submissive feelings?


Links to others responses here.

Wow, where to start with this one?  I think I'll start with the second question.  "Was there a time you questioned or were resistant to your own submissive feelings?" 

Yes.  Many many times, I agonized for years about even approaching Master about the subject.  I forget how I actually came across the knowledge of BDSM, but once I learned about it, I researched it, thought about it, tucked it away as a fantasy, thought about it more, researched it more, tried to bury it deeper.  Again, this went on for years, about 10 years now or so.  I thought there must be something wrong with me.  I was raised by a grandmother who was in charge.  My sister is what I viewed to be a feminist (turns out, she is a Sub as well!), I grew up with many women around me that were in charge, weren't going to be told what to do by men.  My many friends, coworkers, whatever, that were female, also would make comments about men not knowing anything, that they were the ones in charge, etc, etc.  So I thought there was something wrong with me that I didn't want to be that way.  I am a control freak, but I wanted to be at the mercy of a man (my husband).  I wanted him to run the house, to have a firm hand with me.  Hell, I would love it if we had a relationship where I was micromanaged.  

I also was sure that Master would think I was....sick, for lack of a better word.  Not only did I want to be a housewife, caring for the house, taking care of Master, and our daughter, but I wanted rules, punishment, and on top of that, bondage and pain.  I thought for sure something was wrong with me.  Thankfully, Master was understanding, and willing to learn and try.  

As for the first question: "Is there anything about submission (yours or what you see in others) that you question, dislike or repels you?"

Again, yes.  But, I am of the line of thinking that while your fetish may not be my fetish, as long as no one is (unwillingly) being hurt, do what you want.  One thing I really don't get are brats.  I don't understand why you would WANT to misbehave.  

Don't get me wrong, Master and I tease, and play.  It's all in good fun.  But the girls that are bad on purpose, why would you want to make your Master mad?  That is the last thing I want to do, to make Master disappointed in me.  I want to make him proud of me, happy, glad to have me as his submissive.  Otherwise, what is the point?  

With this question, there is actually more that I wish I could do that others get to do, than what I dislike.

But I'm learning to accept what I crave, that it's ok for me to want to be controlled, that it's ok for me to defer to my Master.  I love asking his permission for things, like getting a pop, or spending more.  There are times when it's inconvientent, but I have learned to ask ahead of time, or just go with out.  

I am happy with our life now, and looking forward to where it is headed.  I wouldn't have it any other way.

Pain

Another Journal Prompt from Submissive Guide:


If you are masochist, how do you process pain? Are you the silent type? Screamer? Crier? Is this what is expected of you? How does your partner prefer you to process pain?


Funny, cause last night I realized I can handle pain with MUCH more control than I can handle being tickled.  


When I'm being spanked, or bit, I tend to tense up, become very still, and hold my breath.  So far, I haven't been pushed to crying, I would like to see how much I could take before crying, or using our safe word.  But Master, every so often, pushes it a little further.  I do the "quiet screams" into my pillow, or my arm, or what ever.  


I don't know what my Master prefers when it comes to pain.  To be honest, I think a lot of the pain play is for my benefit, I'm not sure if he gets anything out of it. I appreciate it though, cause I do crave the pain.  There have been times I've asked for spankings.  They seem to help ground me, so when I feel like life is getting out of control (I'm a total control freak), I find that a good spanking helps me handle things better.  


Now tickling, I'm loud, giggling, wriggling around, trying to fight off Master.  I have a love hate relationship with tickling. 


I do know Master enjoys watching me squirm out of pleasure, but I'm not sure how he would like to see me when it comes to pain.  

Tired

Today was one of those days, just moving from one thing to another, not really thinking about what I was supposed to be doing, or when, just trying to keep my head above water.

And I did that.  While I could be using this time right now, since I got home from Girl Scouts a couple hours ago, cleaning the house, I'm not.  I'm sore, and trying to conserve energy for tonight, for Master.  In fact, I'm trying to hurry and get this stuff (blogging and emails) done, so we can hurry up and have play time before I get too tired.

I tried to do week 2 of the Couch to 5 K.  I hurt too bad.  I did 20 minutes, and stopped.  I need to take my fitness a bit slower, and work my way up to running.  I'd rather be able to do smaller work outs more often, than push myself too hard, and not be able to work out for weeks.

Well, I think that's it for today, I want to go play now!

Pms is a terrible thing

I'm pretty sure I'm PMSing.  I'm in one of my, I don't give a shit funks.  And I need to shake it off.

I have a pretty full work week ahead of me.  I need to get on my sales, Master agrees.  I really need to get this full time position when it opens up.

Master picked my new habit this week.  It's cooking at least once a week.  I plan to increase how often I cook as the months go along.  I would really like the majority of our meals to be cooked at home, and as homemade as I can do them.  This will be hard for a few reasons, cause I'm not a good cook, cause money is tight, and cause, if I do end up working full time, I won't have a ton of time.  I plan to use lots of crock pot recipes, and the Freezer cooking methods (make a bunch of something, and freeze them).  But, one step at a time.  In order to get in the habit, I plan to start with the few recipes I know, and then build from there as we have money and such.

I have also REALLY come to appreciate the ways Master and I communicate with each other.  We email nightly, and he reads my blog.  As I said yesterday, I have a hard time with people, and Master is no exception.  Now, don't get me wrong, I'm more comfortable with him than anyone, but I still struggle to talk with him about things, especially things that are really emotional for me, or things I'm feeling really shy about.  So, I email him.  Last night, I emailed him after sex.  I love to do that.  I asked him a few questions, and shared that theses were things I think of during sex.  He seemed to think it was funny what I think of during sex, but I did find out a few things.

I love waking up to his emails, especially when he is awake enough to write a little more than normal.  It helps that we don't see a lot of each other.  Plus, Master isn't a huge person on sharing his feelings, so every once in a while, I get a little glimse into his mind, and I love that.

I had a great day with him yesterday, I'm spending today getting house work and Girl Scout stuff done.  I got laundry caught up, and I still need to do the chin cage.

Tomorrow, while it will be busy, I get to look forward to play time with Master afterward!  YUMMY!

Agoraphobia

I swear I have it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agoraphobia

I would say I'm just shy, but it's more than that.

It's part of the reason I have hard time with my sales at work, I start freaking out just at the thought of talking to customers about products.

I have a problem at church, because we are supposed to great each other twice during the service, shaking hands and such.  I have mini panic attacks each time that happens.

I just have such a hard time interacting with people I don't know.  I enjoy going to church, but if I'm alone (Master or DD not with me) I feel so out of place and lost.

I don't mind doing things like going to the gym, I can just put on my head phones and not interact.  It's the places where I know I'm going to be expected to interact with people that give me panic attacks.

I said I'd fill in at another branch, I freaked out the night before.

Anytime we are invited to a function with one of Master's friends, I freak out.

I don't know why, I know I'm fine, I know that nothing can really happen, but I hate going into the unknown.  I'm always worried about what others think of me.

I hate being this way, but I am.  I don't know how to get past it.

Just another thing for me to work on I guess.

Also, found out today from the Boss Man at work, that there will be a full time position opening up, and from the sounds of it, he has his eye on me to fill it.  So, I gotta push past my fears and get my sales up up up!

Screw it

Well, I had typed a big long post, about how I'd like to live in different era's, and then a cat jumped on my computer, and erased it.

So, now I'm not in the mood.  Maybe another time.

Had a decent day, only worked 4 hours, had a bit of time at home, went to the Y, did day 3 of running, my calves feel like rocks, my legs are killing me.  We ran some errands, and now we are snuggled in the house, watching the snow come down.  Not looking forward to going to work tomorrow.  Especially with the snow....ugh.

But, tomorrow Master is off, so once I get off tomorrow, we will have a nice afternoon, evening, and night together.

So anyway, I'm off to finish my chores, watch Little House on the Prairie, shower and get ready for bed.

Not much

Don't really have a whole lot to say today.

Worked all day, slow, but a decent enough day.  After work DD and I went to the Y.  I did the weights, she worked out on the various cardio machines.  I ate pretty good today.  I'm looking forward to weigh in on Sunday.  I am currently working on getting the house tidied up before bedtime, and watching Pink Floyd's The Wall.

Tomorrow I only work 10-2 (awesome shift for a Friday!) and I do have to work Saturday too, but at least that's just 8:45-1:15!

I'm especially looking forward to Saturday after work, cause Master has the day off.  Should be a good afternoon and evening!

Anyway, I guess that's it for tonight, just an average day today, but it was a good one, except only seeing Master at lunchtime.

It got better

So, my day started off meh.  I got up with DD at 6, went back to bed once she was off to school.  I slept, poorly, for a couple hours.  Then there was a knock at the door, they were here to cut down our tree!  So, the tree that was dying in our front yard is now gone.

I had to work, it was a short shift, but it's hard, after having so many days off, to get back in the swing of things.    Plus we were dead slow.  So I was tired all day (4.5 hours) at work.

Got off, came home, and had dinner.

DD and I went to the Y tonight.  I was so glad she went with me.  I don't want to force her to go, but I'm trying really hard to encourage her to join me when I do go, cause I know she will lose more weight if she does ANYTHING.  She told me today that she doesn't want to weigh as much as she does any more.  I just don't want to force her to do anything, I want her to do what she wants.  But!  She did ask if we can go tomorrow, so I'm planning to go!  Tomorrow will be weights for me, but I got two days of a Couch to 5 K training done!  So, woohoo!

I'm going to make sure I'm in bed at 11.  Got a full day tomorrow, plus we are open later on Thursdays.  But, I can do it!

Almost over

My four day weekend is almost over, and, while it had it not so great moments, it was pretty good over all.

It's times like this though, that I really really miss being a SAHM.  The flexibility of it, being home with Master and DD when they are home.  Being able to do things for them.

I made Master a winter hat, crocheted.  He asked me to, which, I believe, is the first time he asked me to make him anything.  It only took me a couple hours, I need to tweek it a bit, but it's cool.

I really don't have a lot to say tonight, I'm kind of sleepy, need to get things done, and such.  So I guess that's it for the day!

Choices

Taken from Submissive Journal Prompts

One popular idea is that slaves have no choices once they are owned. Others do not agree with this concept. Is this an accurate statement for you?

Ok, in the USA, technically, everyone has rights.  No one can own anyone.  Technically.

Now, for me, in an "ideal" M/s relationship, a slave would have no choices.  But, that would be in a perfect world.  I would love to have a relationship, where I stay at home all the time, where I'm micro managed, I have to ask permission to do everything, all that good stuff.  But again, there is reality.

I currently have choices, and Master actually wants my input when it comes to some things.  And there are days when I'm glad I have choices.  But there are other days, where I wish I didn't.  Part of it is, I don't want to be an adult, part of it is, I don't want to have responsiblity, part of it is, I don't want to think.  I also am a control freak, so to give up complete control like that, seems very hard, but something I'd love to try.

I hope to work our way up to that.  Utter and complete control.

Some day.....

Bitter and sad

While I love going to my dad's, to see him and that side of my family.  I always end up leaving feeling sad, and a little bit bitter.

My mom and dad were never married, and I honestly don't remember him being around a lot.  I have a few memories of going to visit him on the weekends.  Especially the one house he lived it, it was one of those attached houses (I think they are called a duplex) and I would bring my sticker books with the scratch and sniff stickers and trade with the kid next door.  My sister R would come with me (though she had a different dad), and we would eat cold pizza for breakfast.  There were times, when he hadn't been around in a long time, and I'd walk home from school, or be playing out in the front yard, when I would see a car like his drive by, and wonder if it was him (turns out it was).

But I go there now, and I see how he is with my brother, my step sisters, and my niece and nephew.  And I want to cry sometimes.  I feel like I got cheated out of having a dad.  While, I know, I should be grateful that he is in my life now, I still long for what could have been, and can't help but wonder, what our relationship would have been like now, if he had been in my life more as a child.

I know parts of it aren't his fault, my grandma told him to bug off (and she can be a bit intimidating) and, as it turns out, he has Aspergers.  So while, yea, he should have been an adult, he did have a few opposing forces.

But, when I see how he took my younger brothers after divorcing their mom, seeing how he takes care of my step sister.  Watching him with my niece and nephew, changing diapers, playing with them, all that stuff (they basically live with my dad and step mom), I can't help but wonder, why didn't he do that for me?  Why didn't he fight for me?  Try to see me?  Call, write, whatever.  It sucks.

So again, while I enjoy going to visit them (for the most part, but that's a whole different rant for another blog entry), and I do love my dad, it hurts, to watch them all together.  That he knows my step sisters so well, but not me.

I am so looking forward to the next couple days with Master, it should help even out my emotions.

4 days

I have 4 days off!

And it couldn't come at a better time.   There are changes, blowing in the wind at my work.  The "assistant manager" was let go.  They are getting rid of that position, so she has been let go.  That means D will be our direct boss.  We usually go to A for stuff, but no more.  *sigh*

BUT!  Now there is a possibility that a full time position may open up.  So, I have to suck it up buttercup, and work really hard to get my referals, so if the chance comes up, I can take a full time position.  While, I don't want to work more.  I would be getting more hours, which means more money, PLUS the cost of health insurance would be cut in half, so we would be able to afford it!  THAT makes it worth it right there!

Now, onto my four days off.  I have Saturday off, we are always closed Sunday, we are closed this Monday for MLK Jr. Day, and I'm scheduled off on Tuesday.  Tomorrow I get to go to a meeting for parents whose children are in the Science Olympiad this year, then I'll come home, grab our stuff, and head out to my dad's!  We'll stay the night there, and come home some time Sunday.  Then Master, DD and I all have Monday off, and Master and I are off Tuesday.  It should be fun!

Anyway, I need to finish doing stuff, got the kitchen to clean, laundry to finish, the chinchilla cage to clean, and I need to wrap presents (we are going to my dad's to do Christmas!)  Guess I should get my butt off the computer now, time to put on the iPod and jam!

I hate people

No really, some days I totally do.  I'm not a people person, I'm not outgoing at all.  I'm shy, and introverted.  I'm a "I'll do my thing and you do yours" kind of person.  Unless you are hurting someone else, then I tend to find the strength to step in.

I've had a crappy day.  This morning I was grumpy, I was tired, and I think my blood sugar was off, cause little things were getting to me.  I worked alone with N for a while, she gets on my nerves, so when she showed up with her daughter's cookie order form from Girl Scouts, I was irratated.   My daughter has been a scout for 6 years, I brought order forms to work a month or so ago.  Her daughter started LAST NIGHT.  I really don't care if we share orders, or hell, even if everyone orders from her, but because she already drives me batty, it just bothered me.  So there I am, grumpy as hell, and my boss D, comes up and starts his monthly (or so) speech about sales goals, pushing credit cards, and loans, blah blah blah.  There is something about when he starts talking about that stuff that makes me shut down.  I nod and uh-huh in the right places, but it's really going in one ear and out the other, and it's DEFINITLY not motivating me to sell shit to customers.

By the time J showed up I felt like crying, but she lifted my spirits a bit, and by the time I came back from lunch I felt much better.

We were slow, so I was working on GS stuff, and then we got slammed, things got crazy for a while, N spazzed out like she does when we get overloaded with stuff, and D was just his normal wanker self.

Honestly, I enjoy my work, other than the sales.  And what pisses me off the most is, they say, oh, we only want to sell the customer things that they NEED, that will help them.  But then they want us to pitch Credit cards to everyone.  They say, it's not about the sales, it's about the behavoirs of talking to the customer to find out how we can help them, but then they turn around and tell us we need to get 20 credit cards (the whole branch) a month.  To me, those are total mixed signals.

Anyway, there's also Girl Scout crap, but I'll save that for another day.

I had a wonderful night with Master last night.  Looking forward to Monday and Tuesday when we both have off, and I'm looking forward (but not as much) to going to visit my dad and his family Saturday and Sunday.  Just hope it doesn't snow too bad for the drive there and back!

Love time with my Master

Had a GREAT day off with Master!

I stayed up late with him last night, so once DD was off to school, I went back to bed for a couple hours.  Master was up (which is odd for him) I got up at 9, spent some time on the computer, then we got going on our day.  I gave Master a hair cut (shaved his head) and plucked his ear hairs.  I love doing things like this.  I feel like such a bad slave sometimes because I'm not really good with domestic stuff, like cooking and cleaning and such.  So when I am able to do things for him, it makes me feel good, even if it is something easy like just running the clippers over his head.

Anyway, then I cleaned all the hair out of the bathroom.  Yes, we could have done this outside and saved the clean up, but it was cold and I didn't feel like standing out in the cold to do that!

Then we went to do a work out at the Y.  I went once last week, and did about half an hour on the eliptical, but I honestly haven't been much in the last two months, due to illnesses and time constrants.  I'm going to work on getting there as often as possible, and on days I can't make it, try to fit in a little Wii Fit time, or something.  I did the weights today.  WOW!  I've been gone a while, some of those machines were HARD!  But I'm glad I went, it was nice to be back!  I'm looking forward to going on Friday night.

Then we came home, I showered and we waited for DD to get out of school.  She had an early release day, so we ran some errands as a family.  That included dinner, and going to Salvation Army, DD got some shirts so she could use her t shirt designer.  She already has one done.  Problem is, my iron won't work, and you have to heat set the markers on the shirt.  So, I'm going to try to run it through the dryer first, then hand wash it like it says and see what happens.  It is her practice shirt, a .50 cent yellow shirt, so if it doesn't work, it's not a big deal.

Now, Master is sleeping, and I'm getting house work and such done.  I have to work all day tomorrow, and most of the day Friday.  I have a meeting after work tomorrow, grocery shopping to do Friday, and packing.  Another meeting Sat. morning then heading out to my dad's for the weekend.  The great thing is, Master and I both have Monday and Tuesday off, and DD has Monday off as well....

oh the possibilities!

Happy Girl/100 Questions

First and formost, I had a great day today!  Master did so many things today that made me happy, when I came home for lunch, he was up, and making himself something to eat when I came in.  I joined him in the kitchen to make my own lunch, and he grabbed my ass at one point and pressed me up against the stove, kissing me, and biting my nexk.  at that point in time, I was really tempted to ask for sex for lunch.  It would be so great, to be able to fuck during my lunch hour, but alas, I have blood sugar issues and must eat a few times a day.  


Anyway, he also sent me an awesome video message on facebook.  I tell you again, it's the little things that make me so happy!  


Now, because I am tired, and want to save a bit of my energy, here is a fun thing I found on another blog!


Stolen from Curiosity Saved This Kitty


1) Put your iTunes on shuffle. Give me the first 6 songs that pop up.

   1: You Spin Me Round - The Chipmunks

   2: Single Ladies - Beyonce

   3: Hanky Panky - Madonna

   4: Black Horse and The Cherry Tree - KT Tunstall

   5: Beautiful, Dirty, Rich - Lady Gaga

   6: Stronger- Glee

2) If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

   Stephen King

3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

   "The paint was flaked almost to the point of illegibility.

4) What do you think about most?

   To be honest, lately, sex and BDSM. 

5) What does your latest text message from someone else say?

   Okay (From my Master)

6) Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

   Usually with

7) What's your strangest talent?

   I can touch my upper lip to my nose, and I can turn the top part of my ears inside out.

8) Girls.... (finish the sentence); Boys.... (finish the sentence)

   Girls are too much trouble; Boys can be too

9) Ever had a poem or song written about you?

   No, but I was a comic book character (Bubbles)

10) When is the last time you played the air guitar?

   It's been long enough that I can't remember 

11) Do you have any strange phobias?

   I can't sleep with my feet uncovered.  I'm afraid that something, anything, will reach out from under the bed and grab me.

12) Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

   On accident, got a fake nail stuck up there.  

13) What's your religion?

 Catholic and Lutheran mixed.  I currently attend a Catholic church, but grew up Lutheran.  I do find good in almost all religions though. 

14) If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

 Walking the dog.

15) Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

   Behind for the most part.

16) Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

   Yikes!  Where to start....so many, but many are considered single singers, so lets go with....Beatles.

17) What was the last lie you told?

   I lie at work, a lot, saying I'll work harder on referrals, when I usually don't plan to.

18) Do you believe in karma?

   While it may not be Karma exactly, I do believe that you get what you put out there.

19) What does your blog title mean?

   Simply, just me.  And I'm just a girl, an ordinary one.

20) What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

   Greatest weakness, my insecurity

  Greatest strength, my stubborness, I guess.

21) Who is your celebrity crush?

   SOOO many, but I'll go with James Spader

22) Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

   Yup!

23) How do you vent your anger?

   Usually talk (rant) to Master, or cry.

24) Do you have a collection of anything?

   Stephen King books, pens, stuff.

25) Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

   Never done video chatting, so talking on the phone

26) Are you happy with the person you've become?

   Yes, so far, but I'm still on a journey. 

27) What's a sound you hate; sound you love?

   Hate: Forks or knives scraping on a plate

  Love: My Master or DD laughing

28) What's your biggest "what if"?

   What if I had known what was going on with my sister before it was too late.

29) Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

   Short answer yes, both are possible, I believe more in ghosts though.

30) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

   Right- Crafting items (knit/crochet)

  Left- Kindle Fire

31) Smell the air. What do you smell?

  Nothing

32) What's the worst place you have ever been to?

   A port a potty

33) Choose East Coast or West Coast?

  East

34) Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

   I have no idea, but I'm attracted to Meatloaf.

35) To you, what is the meaning of life?

   To be as nice to your fellow man, live the best life you can, and follow the golden rule, Do Unto Others, as you would have them do unto you.  

 36) Define Art.

  Anything that helps you express your feelings and beliefs. Things that stir up emotions in other people. 

37) Do you believe in luck?

  Not really. 

38) What's the weather like right now?

   Cold (but not as cold as normal) , but it was sunny today.  

39) What time is it?

   10:37 pm

40) Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

   Yes, and yes

41) What was the last book you read?

   Currently reading:

The Bible

The Gunslinger

S&M 101 

(talk about variety!)

42) Do you like the smell of gasoline?

NO!

43) Do you have any nicknames?

  Yes, my favorite though, is Baby Girl

44) What was the last movie you saw?

   Watched Mommy Dearest last night.

45) What's the worst injury you've ever had?

   Not counting child birth, I guess it would be cracking my forehead open when I was 2 or 3 I don't remember it though.

46) Have you ever caught a butterfly?

   I've had them land on me in various butterfly houses.

47) Do you have any obsessions right now?

   OH SO MANY!

Stephen King

Horror Movies

BDSM related things

Secretary (the movie) 

I could go on!

48) What's your sexual orientation?

   Straight, but I wouldn't kick Drew Barrymore out of my bed.  I'm also a slave, and submissive, and masochist.  

49) Ever had a rumor spread about you?

   Oh yes.

50) Do you believe in magic?

   I think there is magic out there, even if it's man made.

51) Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

   It depends, but I have held grudges, and one I don't know if I'll ever let go of.

52) What is your astrological sign?

   Aries

53) Do you save money or spend it?

   I am a reformed spender. 

54) What's the last thing you purchased?

   We ate dinner out as a family.

55) Love or lust?

   Love

56) In a relationship?

   YES!

57) How many relationships have you had?

 Depends on what you consider a relationship.  More than I care to remember. 

58) Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

   No

59) Where were you yesterday?

   Work and Girl Scouts

60) Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

   DD's Kindle cover

61) Are you wearing socks right now?

   No

62) What's your favorite animal?

   Dogs and Cats

63) What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

   Acting like a little girl.

64) Where is your best friend?

   At home sick (if you don't count Master, he's on the couch!)

65) Spit or swallow?(;

   Swallow (learning to any way)

66) What is your heritage?

   The parts I know are English, German, Norwegian, Bohemian, and Romanian

67) What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

  Sleeping

68) What do you think is Satan's last name?

   I don't think he has one

69) Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

   Many times!

70) Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

   I think, for the most part, yes.  

71) You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

   Save the dog.  There is no way I could let a dog drown.  I'm sure Master would understand if I got fired under that circumstance.

72) You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

   A: Family, and friends would know

   B: Spend every moment possible with the ones I love

   C: While I know there is something better waiting, yes, I would be.I don't like the unknown/

73) You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

   No way!  They go hand in hand.

74) What's a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

   If I Had  a Million Dollars 

75) What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

   Yea, no.

76) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

   Patience, trust, honesty, love, and humor, just to name a few things.

77) How can I win your heart?

   It's the little things, but showing how much you know me helps.

78) Can insanity bring on more creativity?

   In some cases, sure.

79) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

   To marry my Master

80) What size shoes do you where?

   8- 9

81) What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

   She was loved.

82) What is your favorite word?

   Today, it's wanker.

83) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

   Blood

84) What is a saying you say a lot?

   I'm tired.

85) What's the last song you listened to?

   Defying Gravity- Glee

86) Basic question; what's your favorite color/colors?

   Black, Navy blue, Maroon, Hunter Green

87) What is your current desktop picture?

  

88) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

   Ohhh, hmmmm, Lindsey Lohan

89) What would be a question you'd be afraid to tell the truth on?

   It would depend who was asking.

90) One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do?

   Scream, and try to get the hell out of my room.

91) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

   Reading minds

92) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

   The first date I had with Master, or when DD was born.

93) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

  My sister getting molested.

94) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

   If I were single, it would be Meatloaf.

95) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

   England

96) Do you have any relatives in jail?

   It's possible, but not that I'm aware of.

97) Have you ever thrown up in the car?

   Probably

98) Ever been on a plane?

   Yes

99) If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

   Why can't everyone get their acts together.  Grow up, treat each other right!

100) Give me your top 5 favorite blogs on blogspot.

   1: Turn the Paige

   2: Domestic Servitude

   3: Curiosity Saved This Kitty

   4: Halle the Homemaker

   5: One Good Thing

Now, off to play time with Master.....if I can wake him up.